News from the Front

There is mixed news on the war front. The good news is that we have an ally in Mr. Boudoli, the caretaker of the property, who, to our delight, cleans the battlefield regularly. The bad news is that we have had a casualty. Georg, our very first dinner guest, got hit by a live hash shell during dinner. We are relieved to report that he seems to have survived the attack without permanent damage. Most disturbingly, he was deep within the Green Zone when the shelling occurred. Clearly the Green Zone isn’t as safe as we initially believed it to be. We suspect the enemy is trying new weaponry that projects further than we anticipated. Georg suggested an umbrella as a defensive weapon. We are inclined toward a solution that is more violent - oops! I mean more definitive.